Raising kids regardless their age, is a very sensitive and delicate job which requires constant efforts to prepare them for the real world. Parents have to instil the right values, set good examples, encourage them to adopt good language or even something as simple as using the right words. Words can have a lasting impact, especially because kids are at an impressionable age. That is why it is often said that one should be deeply mindful and cautious of what they say or blurt out in front of children.
Practice the art of positive parenting
Kids might be young but they can grasp everything – the good or the bad. According to experts, what adults say or speak has a big role to play in developing a child’s growing and expanding mind. While abusive and harsh words are a big no-no, there are also certain other words you should never be speaking in front of children. When you moderate your speech, you are not just practicing self-censorship but also going a step further in practicing positive, effective parenting. Remember, the names you are not comfortable about your kid calling another kid, you should not be saying them to your children either.
At no time should you be speaking or be involved in a conversation in negative tones. One of the words you should refrain from using is “spoiled”. They may not understand the meaning in totality and may feel hurt. Using such words can hurt their self-esteem and make it difficult for them to open uo without inhibitions.
While it is good to appreciate your child’s intellect and praise their IQ, scientists believe that calling them “smart” takes away their actual hard work, forces them to believe that they are born with a different form of intelligence and in turn, feel different from others.
There is a valid reason why you should stop referring to your children using negative words. Whether in a fit of rage or just to mock them, any kind of name-calling is bad. Remember, you should be talking directly to your children and not brand them with negative names.
According to psychologists, gender stereotyping should not be encouraged at all and using words like “princess” or “hero” can cage them into boxes even before they have had a chance to explore identity or gender fluidity for themselves. If your children take on the name themselves after watching a film or reading about an inspiring character, then it is okay. Otherwise, try and avoid stereotyping.
This article first appeared in the “TOI”.
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